It’s Giveaway Time!
Thank you all for playing. You all did a great job and had us cracking up. Unfortunately, we could only pick 10 of you and here goes the list!
Congrats Vi, Shweta, Prisca Pires, Neha Borkar, Sj Dc, Vidhu M, Shevanjlee aneja,Prutha Pathak, Parul M., and Palak. You will be hearing from u soon!
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It’s Wednesday and we’ve got a mid-week mood lifter for you! Up for grabs are 10 pairs of colorful frames (all unisex) courtesy of SFX Eyewear.
So what do you have to do to win? Well, it’s your turn to lift our mood. Tell us (via the comments section), the funniest/corniest/ROFL eye or glasses related joke ( or funny line) that you can crack.
For e.g. “What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer!”
At the end of the contest, we’ll choose 10 winners that had us in a bit of a chuckle. Note: our picks will be final.
Also don’t forget to like SFX Eyewear on Facebook here or follow them on Twitter here.
Do keep in mind-
– Giveaway closes on the 14th July β14.
– Ten best answers will be selected from a pool of qualified entries.
– Giveaway is open only to residents of India.
I am so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed! π
Girl to Boy- “Why do you wear specs only when I come in”?
Boy replied- “The Doctor advised me to wear specs only when I get a headache “:)
Where is the eye located?
-between the H and the J.
A short Polish immigrant went to the DVLA to apply for a driver’s license.
First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test.
The optician showed him a card with the letters. On the bottom row were these letters: ‘C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.’
‘Can you read this?’ the optician asked.
‘Read it?’ the Polish guy replied – ‘I know the fellow.’
What was the len’s excuse to the policeman?
I’ve been framed, officer!!
lOL,
Shalini
What did the sailor say to the captain of the optom (optometric) boat?
-eye-eye captain
Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Because breasts don’t have eyes π π
A Polish immigrant went to apply for a driver’s license. First, of course, he had to take an eyesight test.
The optician showed him a card with the letters: ‘C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.’
‘Can you read this?’ the optician asked.
‘Read it?’ the Polish guy replied – ‘I know the fellow.’
What did the blind hip hop star crave?
Eyes Eyes Baby!
Optician: You need glasses.
Patient: But I’m wearing glasses.
Optician: Then I need glasses.
wat did one eye wear tell to the other? : eye for an eye :p
What was the lensβs excuse to the policeman?
I have been framed officer π
What did the sailor say to the captain of the optom boat?
Eye-eye captain
What did the left and the right eye agree on?
–Something between us smells!!
What was the lensβs excuse to the policeman?
-Iβve been framed officer
Liked on facebook & following on Twitter
A man went to an eye specialist to get his eyes tested and asked, βDoctor, will I be able to read after
wearing glasses?β
βYes, of course,β said the doctor, βwhy not!β
βOh! How nice it would be,β said the patient with joy, βI have been illiterate for so long.β
“Doctor, doctor! I need glasses!”
“You certainly do, ma’am. This is a barber shop.”
Good eyesight
“Yes,” said Sam, “I saw him steal the goods.”
The lawyer asked Sam again, “Sam, this happened at night. Are you sure you saw my client commit this crime?”
“Yes” said Sam, “I saw him do it.”
Then the lawyer said, “Sam, listen, you are 75 years old and your eyesight is probably pretty bad. Just how far can you see at night?”
Sam quickly replied, “I can see the moon, how far is that?”
What do you say to a spy when you spot one?
Eye spy
HHC: Are you feeling the pressure to make a great joke here?
Me: Yes, eye am!
Ram had lived a long life, which was drawing to its end. As his family surrounded him on his deathbed, he asked to see his optometrist.
“Optometrist?” they asked. “Why in the world do you want to see your optometrist?”
“Just get him for me.”
So they go get Dr. Kriplani, who, on seeing Ram about to depart this life, asked, “Ram, it pains me to see you like this. What can I possibly do for you?”
Ram opened his eyes slightly and said, “Doc, before I go, there’s one thing I have to know. Which one was clearer – A or B?”
What do you call a potato with glasses?
A SPEC-tator! π
What did the mummy contact lens say to the naughty child contact lens?
– I’ve had enough, go and sit in the cornea!
Hope you liked it.
Liked their facebook page and followed on twitter too.
What did the right eye say to the left eye?
Between you and me, thereβs something that smells! π
Why did a nerd raised his glasses in a party?
Because, the host said, “let’s raise the glasses to celebrate the success.”
Someone tweeted this gem recently π
“I’m returning the glasses I bought for my husband. He’s still not seeing things my way.”
John went to an eye specialist to get his eyes tested and was prescribed glasses. He asked the doctor if these will I be able to read the newspaper after wearing glasses?”
“Yes, of course,” said the doctor, “why not!”
“Oh! How nice it would be,” said the John with joy, “I have been illiterate all my life so far.”
Did you hear the one about the optician who fell into the lens grinder? He made a spectacle of himself.:p
How many optometrists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
( I donβt know)
You tell me.. is it one or two?
Liked the Facebook page;
Followed on Twitter;
now the joke that cracked me up – –
“What did the mummy contact lens say to the naughty child contact lens??
– I’ve had enough, go and sit in the cornea.!” π π
(looks funnier when you imagine naughty little contact lenses going haywire) π
PS lusting over the orange/coral frame π
A man went to an eye specialist to get his eyes tested and asked, “Doctor, will I be able to read after wearing glasses?”
“Yes, of course,” said the doctor, “why not!”
“Oh! How nice it would be,” said the patient with joy, “I have been illiterate for so long.”
After being teased for ages for wearing specs, here is something from my side (without offending anyone!)
What was the lensβs excuse to the policeman?
-Iβve been framed officer!!!
Knock, Knock?
Who’s there?
Eye
Eye who?
Eye don’t know who you are but i will find you and I will kill you.
Q:What do you do when you see a ghost?
A: Eye scream!
Q:What do you do when you see a one-eyed ghost?
A: Eye scream!
I heard this funny one liner from my dad once (cracked me up because my mom was right there)
“If love is blind, then marriage is a real Eye-opener”
One more:
Your mom has such thick glasses that when she looks at map, she can see people waving :p
Liked on Facebook n followed on Twitter π
A Czech goes to the optician who shows him a eye examination card with the letters
C Z W X N Q S T A C Z
“Can you read this?” the optician asks.
“Read it?” the Czech replies, “I even know the guy.”
“Doctor doctor!!! I need glasses.”
“Of course ma’am, this is a barber shop”
Why did the little boys mother get angry with his spectacles?
Because they were covering his Aai (eye) π
Why did the little boys’ mother get angry with his spectacles?
Because they were covering his Aai (eye) π
Looking on the bright side hurts my eyes.
One of the best giveaway winning techniques I came across on HHC. Would love to grab a pair of these beauties. Here’s my witty line for the sexy-eyed :
I’m so SPECTACULAR. My future’s so bright , I gotta wear shades. B)
Cheers ! π
Q. What was the lensβs excuse to the policeman?
-Iβve been framed officer π
Q. What music do optoms listen to?
-itunes
How would I ask you to ID Sonam’s glasses? Eye-kaun? π
Can eyebrows your computer?
Yo mammaβs glasses are so thick, when she looks at a map she sees people waving!
The rest, done!
Santa: I lost my contact lens!!!
Banta: Serves you right! I told you to keep an eye on them!!
The blind carpenter picked up his hammer and saw π
What was the lensβs excuse to the policeman?
-Iβve been framed officer!
Patient: I am seeing spots before my eyes.
Optometrist:Β Didn’t the new glasses help?
Patient: Sure, now I see the spots much clearer.
This giveaway is very interesting!
mom : at eye appt i’ll call later
daughter : eye see
mom: u still got it
daughter : what can i say i’m your star pupil
mom: fold your wash star
daughter : iris i dint have to
mom : stooooooooooooop
daughter : sorry my jokes keep getting Cornea π
done ! liked n followed
if u have one eye on yesterday and one eye on tomorrow,your going to be cockeyed today π
Can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus π
And again and again, poor Medusa has to find herself a new optometrist.. π π
TV mechanic to man:-“The problem isn’t your high definition television,it’s your low definition eyes.”
ans . What did the sailor say to the captain of the optom boat…?
Following you on Fb and Twiiter too with @aasmaankipari π
What did the sailor say to the captain of the boat?
-eye-eye captain.
following on FB
1. While doing surgery the surgeon asked the nurse:nurse,get on the internet ,go to surgery.com scroll down and click on the “are you totally lost”?? icon
2.Only one thing is more powerful then the strength of powerful signals of Wifi and that is Wife eye .At full strength, one of them makes you feel powerful, while the other one shuts you down completely.
3. Boy kept going to the ophthalmist because his left eye hurt. The eye specialist told boy,’Your eye hurts only when you drink tea. I suggest you can’t drink tea.’
Boy stuttered, ‘But I love tea with two sugars.’
The opthalmist said, ‘Okay, then make sure you take the spoon out.
Two women are seated at a restaurant and one of them removes her sunglasses to reveal a very colorful black eye.
“Wow! How’d ya get the shiner?” her companion asks.
“From my boyfriend.”
“But I thought he was out of town.”
“So did I!”
Where is the eye located?
-between the H and the J.
An optician asks his patient, “When did you last have your eyes checked?”
The patient replies, “Never, they’ve always been brown.” :p
Little birdie in the sky,
dropping droppings in my eye.
I don’t complain, I don’t cry,
I thank God cows don’t fly.
A doctor asks the patient, “When did you last get your eyes checked?”
The patient replies, “Never, they’ve always been brown.” :p
What did the right eye say to the left eye?
Between you and me, thereβs something that smellsβ¦
1 Lady says Doctor doctor, I need glasses!
Definitely ma’am.! This is barber shop.
2 Have u ever seen rabbit wearing glasses ?but I need candilicious glasses to hog on carrots atleast :p
P.s I so love candilicious collection of sfxeyewear. Hope to win one.
In bed ,its 6 am,you close your eyes for 5 minutes…its 7:45 π‘
At work its 3:00 pm,you close your eyes for 5 minutes …its 3:01 π
What did the shipmate say to his blind captain?
Eye-eye Captain!
(oh god, i love making these up!)
Love at first SIGHT can be cured by a second LOOK.
If u have one eye on yesterday and one eye on tomorrow you are going to be cockeyed today
At the eye doctor ….. Doctor – please read the lowest line you can . Me- Made in China
When life gives u lemons , squeeze them in people’s eyes
I sleep with my glasses put on, simply to see my dreams more clearly
A cross eyed teacher can keep twice the number of children in order than any other , because the pupils do not know who she is looking at.